Comments Policy
Shrink4Men encourages open discussion amongst its community, readership and visitors. However, there are certain kinds of comments that won’t be published or will be removed.
1. You must register to leave a comment. Email addresses are required for commenting. They’re not published on the blog nor shared. They may be used by Shrink4Men to privately contact the commenter.
2. Keep it civil. Differences of opinion can lead to helpful exchanges of information, but keep it respectful. Please refrain from personal attacks, flaming, name calling and other forms of verbal aggression. You may question or argue the content, but not attack the blogger nor any other commenters. Failure to respect fellow participants and contributors on this blog could result in removal and blocked access. Shrink4Men reserves the right to delete or hold questionable comments in moderation that cross the line or appear to be intended to inflame, shame or otherwise disrupt the purpose of the blog.
3. No identifying information. Please refrain from using your actual name, your children’s names, your wife’s/girlfriend’s/ex’s/sister’s-in-law/daughter’s-in-law/judge’s/court evaluator’s/husband’s/boyfriend’s/etc. actual names, places of work, telephone number, home address, etc. Comments will be deleted that contain identifying information. This is for your protection.
4. ALL CAPS. It’s the digital equivalent of shouting and, it has to be said, makes the individual writing in all caps come across as a bit deranged.
5. No sockpuppeting. Sockpuppeting is “the act of creating a fake online identity to praise, defend or create the illusion of support for one’s self, allies or company.”
6. Excessive profanity. This website is for adults. Occasional profanity to make a point or if you’re quoting another person may be necessary, but please try to choose your words judiciously.
7. No woman bashing. No man bashing. Abusers come in both sexes. It is neither a man nor a woman problem; it is a problem for everyone. Men are at a disadvantage because our society still doesn’t believe that women can be the abusive partner; however, attacking women as an entire gender will not advance the cause.
8. No comment spam. Any comment assumed to be possible comment spam will be deleted and marked as comment spam.
9. What it means if your comment doesn’t appear after you submit it. All first time comments are held in moderation for approval. If it doesn’t appear right away it probably means the moderator hasn’t reviewed it yet. Once it’s been approved, subsequent comments will appear right away as long as you’re logged in. Alternatively, if your previous comments have been approved and a more cent comment disappears, it has probably been removed for violating the Comments Policy.
10. Limit links. Shrink4Men automatically holds any comment with more than one link in moderation, which may delay your comment from appearing on this blog. Any blog comment with more than two links could be marked as comment spam.
11. Thread hijacking or tangenting. A comment which does not add to the conversation, runs off on an inappropriate tangent or kills the conversation may be edited, moved or deleted.
12. Blocked commenters. Anyone who violates this Comments Policy may be blocked from future access and/or commenting on Shrink4Men.
13. Trackbacks are comments. All trackbacks will be treated inline with our Comments Policy.
14. All rights reserved. Shrink4Men reserves the right to edit, delete, move or mark as spam any and all comments. Shrink4Men also has the right to block access to any one or group from commenting or from Shrink4Men.
15. Hold harmless. All comments within Shrink4Men are the responsibility of the commenter, not the website owner, administrator, contributor, editor or author. By submitting a comment on Shrink4Men, you agree that the comment content is your own and to hold this site, Shrink4Men, and all subsidiaries and representatives harmless from any and all repercussions, damages or liability.
Stumble It!
My sister found your website and now just about everyone in our family has tuned in as we try to support her son who is going thru what is described in your website. It has helped us all to understand what he is going thru and why he feels so helpless. It has also helped relieve my nephew of some of the guilt he carries for not being “man enough” to stay in his marriage with this very sick young woman who has verbally abused him for the entire ten years they’ve been married. In our church he is constantly told that he needs to pray more, repent, do this, do that…all of which he has tried but to no avail…. If he needs to do these things so should his soon to be ex-wife, but she doesn’t have anything to repent of she says. She has continually esmaculated this guy until his sense of worth has plummeted to the very bottom. He is socially astute, physically fit, good looking in a Mark Paul Gosselar way, he is witty, he is smart, he works hard (two jobs to try to keep up with massive credit card debt she rings up “because she will not be deprived of what she needs.”) And saddest of all, is that their two children, a 7 yr old boy and 5 year old girl talk to their dad like their mother does. Thank you for all the wise commentary and comments…..so helpful!
I cant believe this is something others have expierienced, and how every single circumstance mentioned ,has been my life for over 10 years ,I keep hoping that someday she will finally click , and change how things are and finally realize how harsh it is to treat someone this way . I often wonder why i can`t force myself to stop and say “hey if you cant love and be a person who feels ,and cares then im gone” but i always bite my tounge , i just widh ther was a way to make her stop and to give back even a third of what i do.. thanks for giving me a feeling of hope ,and sight of relief,
After spending 3 years with a now 35 year old borderline, I have been blessed with a beautiful 2 year old son, but the mom is crazy. Her routine is a predator hunting down new men, and placing her sexual hook in them within 60 days. And then the sex never ends. You think you are in heaven when after a while, it is hell in disguise.
I am the fourth different man she has a child with. Rageaholic is the best description. I was arrested twice, had to go through family court to see my son, and even after court established guidelines have been set, she is still resistant.
$14,000 later, my career in limbo, my family alienated, her sexual hyoeractivity now has her with a new man, 60, as when she is done using the men in her life, she literally has other men on the hook so as to never be alone.
Her outer beauty is the devil in disguise. I am 62, another dad is 65, one is a man of color 41, and the last is of Spanish decent, is 38 and is in prison on drug charges for another 7 years. And no one knows what happened, but more likely her disdain for the law put him there.
She has no sense of empathy, lies about everything, and controls all men by getting them into bed and using the push pull psychological treatment to keep them around.
Best I can say is, when all they talk about is themselves, are grandiose, always trying to be thinner, wear revealing clothing, use physical violence as negotiating tools, and must win at everything, it is time to run gentleman.
She cannot and will not change. Get a blood test, find a place to go, and find a friend to help you go through the release you will need to remove the tentacles of narcisisstic behavior that will eat at you until you decide to heal.
This is about emotional control, and will use it on everyone to get her way. God Bless on your finding the true love in your life. Which is you, self respect, and your family.
RUN!!!!!!!
hi, iv’e recently started logged onto yr website and find it relaxing,knowing that i am not alone with this problem of an emotionaliy abusive partner.my wife and i married for 14 yrs.iwe met 3 months after my divorce and she was like a breadth of fresh air.she was passionate,loving and very caring.in all that i experienced short bursts of anger and verbal abuse but overlooked it after sincere apologies everytime it happened.she always got very angry when things dindnt go her way or when finances were low.after every outburst she would scream divorce.after 10 yrs of marriage she finally left to be with her family 500 miles away.her family encouraged her to leave me saying i gave her this mental illness.3 mnths later she returned full of remorse and promises to be better. this went on approx every 8 to 10 months leaving and returning altogether 7 times in the past 4 years.2 days ago we had an argument about finances again and she has decided to leave.she now feels she has employment so she does not need me.” called me a loser,sly person,f….in useless and many words.this would make me feel very useless as in the past and wondered if any other women would want me.im finding it very hard to let go as i love her with all my heart.we have no kids together.i have 2 girls which are 21 and 22 yrs old and independant.she has three girls of which the 16 year old is living with us and also showing signs of bpd.my wife has attempted suicide twice,both after an argument and her daughter had cut herself with and razor blade and received stitches in hospital.