Home > Abusive relationships, Borderline Personality Disorder, divorce, Marriage, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, relationships > The High-Conflict Mind: Able to Judge, But Not to Discern and How It Affects You

The High-Conflict Mind: Able to Judge, But Not to Discern and How It Affects You

There’s a new article  on www.shrink4men.com that explores the difference between the judging mind versus the discerning mind. It makes the argument that many high-conflict and/or abusive personality-disordered individuals judge others based on their own inconsistent emotional states, but are unable to assess situations with logical and factual discernment. It also explores the results of this phenomenon, which include splitting (i.e., black and white/all-or-nothing thinking) and ongoing abuse directed toward the partner of the high-conflict individual or anyone who challenges or criticizes the high-conflict individual.

Here’s the link:

High-Conflict and Abusive Personality-Disordered Women: The Emotional Judging Mind Vs. the Discerning Mind

Kind Regards,

Dr Tara J. Palmatier, PsyD

  1. Ryan
    January 18, 2011 at 11:56 am

    Thank you so much for your website. It means a lot to me because I’ve been searching for a way to define the violence and abuse of my ex-girlfriend. I have had trouble understanding it and even more so being able to define and talk about it to someone.

    She would set me up so to speak. I can’t explain how manipulative she was. I didn’t understand how she was able to bring me to such a terrible place. At one point I was left standing on the side of the road in tears. She would set me up. I always attempted to try and understand her but there was no way out. I thought it was because she was a woman and I didn’t understand. I thought it was me and blamed myself. It was not that at all. She hurt me and abused me very deeply. She robbed me of any sense of control and would continually leave me feeling helpless. She set up emotional trap doors.

    How do you explain this abuse, how do you put it into words? When she made false allegations against me and used women’s laws against me I can’t put into words what it did to me and how I still deal with the helplessness, the feelings of being overpowered and raped. Being robbed of my trust. She raped me! Does that make sense to you??? She raped me of everything. There is no law that can protect men from this or even children….NONE!

    • shrink4men
      January 18, 2011 at 3:15 pm

      Hi Ryan,

      I’m sorry you’re going through this. Do you have anyone who you can talk to for support? A friend or family member? What is the status with your children?

      Also, I’m not really using the old blog anymore, except to post updates to the new site, which is what you posted on (this is an update announcement). I encourage you to register at the new website http://www.shrink4men.com and the forum if you would like to fins some support.

      Dr Tara

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