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How to Crazy-Proof Yourself After Breaking Up with an Abusive Woman

There’s a new article on www.Shrink4Men.com that explains how to break the pattern of dating and/or becoming involved with crazy and abusive women by learning how to Crazy-Proof your romantic life in 10 steps.

Here’s the link:

How to Crazy-Proof Yourself After Breaking Up with or Divorcing an Abusive Girlfriend or Wife, Part 1

Shrink4Men Coaching and Consulting Services:

Dr Tara J. Palmatier provides confidential, fee-for-service, consultation/coaching services to help both men and women work through their relationship issues via telephone and/or Skype chat. Her practice combines practical advice, support, reality testing and goal-oriented outcomes. Please visit the Shrink4Men Services page for professional inquiries.

  1. jaydee (jim)
    March 30, 2011 at 4:12 pm

    I really like this article because I am nervous in a lot of respects to start dating again. However, what I am armed with is the knowledge of what ISN’T a good relationship. Below are my answers to Dr. T’s questions in caps to make it easy to see the answers. I am not shouting :). Some of these traits are easier to recognize and change. Others I will have to have my antenae up and bounce things off people I trust…like my family and friends (right D?).

    Dr. T’s questions:
    “Are you a “nice guy?” YES. Are you non-confrontational and eager to please? NOT REALLY (to non-confrontational). YES (to eager to please-I’ve beent this way as long as I can remember). Were you raised to respect women no matter what? YES Do you believe it’s your job to cater to a woman’s every need? NO, I NEVER DID BUT I ALWAYS LIKED TO BECAUSE IT FEELS GOOD TO DO THINGS FOR THEM BECAUSE I CARE. Do you believe love is supposed to hurt? THIS ONE IS EASY…HELL NO!!! NEVER DID!!! Do you believe it’s your job to make your partner happy? NO, I NEVER HAVE. BUT I ALWAYS DID MY DAMNEDEST WITH THE STBX BECAUSE I WANTED OUR MARRIAGE TO WORK. Do you believe it’s “bad” to put your needs first? I NEVER BELIEVED IT’S BAD BUT ALWAYS THOUGHT IT TO BE CHIVALROUS. THIS ONE WILL BE EASY FOR ME TO RECTIFY. I KNOW THAT IF I AM HEALTHY THEN MY RELATIONSHIPS (FAMILY, CHILDREN, SIGNIFICANT OTHERS) WILL BE HEALTHY TOO. Do you believe it’s important to keep the peace at all costs? THIS WILL BE NO PROBLEM ANYMORE FOR ME. I DID FOR 20 YEARS BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT I SAW MY DAD DO – MOM DIDN’T HAVE PD- IT’S JUST WHAT I SAW. NOT BLAMING DAD. So, my concern is recognizing personality disorder redflags in future significant others. My plan is to GO SLOW because I remember dating my STBX that I knew I was going to marry her after like 2 weeks. The longer I date someone, I’ll know. I just I get good at recognizing things sooner rather than later. AND I will have ZERO issues setting boundaries.

    Thanks again for a fabulous article.

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